.

"If I truly love her, I should hold on to the idea that she's no longer in pain rather than the fact that she's no longer here."

Like she would often say, death is painful only to the living. It hurts the ones who are left behind, and that's the irony of it all.

I learnt today that loving her also means letting her go. Crazy shii, by the way, especially for someone who once told her, "I won't forgive you if you die on me." But knowing her is knowing that she fought really hard. She tried, she really did, and now she gets to rest.

When we love people, we're often selfish. We want them to remain what they've always been to us. We want their presence, their warmth, the comfort of knowing they're there. And sometimes, without even realising it, it becomes more about us than them, about how they make us feel and what their presence adds to our lives.

But perhaps love is also about caring enough to want what's best for another person, even when that means accepting that you may no longer be part of the picture.

Dearest reader, I have no grand insight for you. I'm out here just processing my grief, a day at a time. And today's little snippet is this; loving someone goes beyond what their presence does for you. Sometimes, it means finding the grace to let them rest, even when all you want is to have them here.

And God knows I'd give anything to have her here.

@favvy_Okwans🖤.