Favvy_Okwans🖤

We all do silly things every now and then. It’s human to err. But you know what is pretty hard? Apologizing. Going back to say, “You know what, I messed up. That’s on me. No excuses. And I swear it won’t happen again.” We don’t talk about how hard that is. Admitting you are wrong the proper way. Instead, we play it cool and hope the other person eventually comes around. So I did something bad. Something outright disrespectful toward a neighbour of mine. The funny thing is that it wasn’t even intended. But being me, I beat myself up about it the whole day. At the end of the day, I managed to gather the courage to go and apologize properly. And that’s when I realized again that admitting you’re wrong is hard. In my head I knew there was no justification for what I did. Still, it was the hardest thing I had to do today. And trust me, I had a very crappy day. I stood for several hours. Yet those few minutes of apology made me panic so badly I felt like my heart would jump right...

So I wrote a poem for mother's day, dedicated to all those grieving, just because we hardly talk about how it feels to celebrate this day with absence for breakfast. So here goes nothing; To everyone whose mother isn’t here anymore. Today may seem heavy. The posts, the pictures, the long calls you cannot make. The hugs you cannot give. But love like that doesn’t disappear. It lives in the things that reminds you of her. So today, if your heart feels tender, let it. Grief is proof that love was real. And somehow, in ways we cannot fully explain, a mother’s love never really leaves. Happy Mother’s Day. To the ones remembering, to the ones missing, to the ones loving from afar. @favvy_Okwans🖤.

My favourite text from the book of Book of Proverbs is Proverbs 13:20. It reads, and I quote, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” It is just right. Association is a powerful factor we mostly underestimate. Have you ever been part of a group and it suddenly dawned on you that you can be more? You may not even notice it at first. You just keep hanging around certain kinds of people, and their consistent behaviour begins to subtly rub off on you. One day you wake up and realize you have come far from where you used to be. You have picked up certain foreign traits simply as a result of association. Hence the need for your circle to be solid. I once read somewhere that if you want to go further or climb higher, surround yourself with people who are actively climbing, or who have already climbed to the point you desire. Their experience may just rub off on you. That is why mentorship exists. As a lazy person, let me share this small hack with you. If ...

Some days you feel like you’re doing well in life. Other days you’re just there wondering if anything you’re doing is even working. And the funny thing is both can be happening at the same time. You can be growing and still feel confused. You can be making progress and still feel like you’re behind. You can be trying your best and still feel like it’s not enough. Life is strange like that. But one thing I’m slowly learning is that not every season of life will give you visible results. Some seasons are just for showing up, learning quietly, adjusting your mindset and trusting that eventually things will make sense. You might not see it now, but something is shifting. Dearest reader, if today feels a little uncertain, breathe, continue, tomorrow might explain what today cannot. @favvy_Okwans🖤.

I used to wear my heart on my sleeve, but over time I now understand what Huwa meant when she said, “I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve, I wrap it in brown paper.” Because mehn, life no really send you and your squeezed face. It doesn’t get easier. And if you want to be mad about things not working the way you want them to, oga, you’ll never really be happy. It’s not because the universe is against you. It’s because life happens. Like they say, every day is not Christmas. In fact, the higher you climb, the less Christmas you get. And that’s fine. You just adjust. You move on. There’s this quote I see online a lot that says the best gift you can have is the ability to quickly move on. You had a bad day? Get over it. Something isn’t working? Try another way. Because if you dwell too much on what’s not working, you’ll miss out on what is. I also read somewhere that we have the ability to reset our brain. That is, our brain has reset buttons. For instance, if you suddenly feel sad, sit up ...

I was speaking with a senior the other day and he was like, "When life gives you bitterleaf," trying to act smart I responded with, "Make bitterleaf juice." Oga was like, "Nah, not in Nigeria. In Nigeria, when life gives you bitterleaf, you are expected to make lemonade. It's nobody's business how to get it done, you have no excuse." And it sounds wild, because how on earth am I going to make lemonade from bitterleaf? From where to where? Abi I dey perform magic or wenti. But let's be real, why some people are given lemons (silver spoon), there's another group given bitterleaf (wooden spoon), and both are expected to get the same result, 'lemonade.' When you’re given bitterleaf, you have to wash, squeeze, and prepare it. You have to work harder just to reach the starting line. Some people’s lemonade comes easy; for others, every drop is earned. Dearest reader, that’s the point. Life doesn’t hand out fairness. It hands out work. And ...