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Yakubs...

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“Yakubu manage. It will do like you want to die, you will not die.” Have you heard this meme recently? It is so hilarious eh. Sometimes I will just be on my own, mostly when I am struggling with something and starting to feel frustrated, and that sound will just play in my head. That is how I gather strength, because at the end of the day, I know I will get through whatever it is. I remember having a hard time with one recent thing I jumped on today. In the middle of my frustration, my boss called. I immediately broke down complaining. He just listened and nodded. When I was done, he casually told me how crazy his own day had been. I instantly stopped complaining and faced my stress. Because again, I will not die. It may feel like the end, but it is not. We still have a long ride ahead. You know that thing people say, that if everyone drops their problems on a table to exchange, once we see what others are carrying, we will quietly pick our own and walk away. Because it is not really s...
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  “Don’t put yourself in a position where you are at the mercy of someone else’s intention and they don’t have the capacity to do right by you” ~ Eric Gugua. We often cling to intention because it sounds good. It feels safe to hear someone say they mean well, that they care, that they would never intentionally hurt you.  But intention without capacity is a quiet danger. You can be loved by someone who still does not have the emotional, mental, or practical ability to show up rightly for you. Good intentions do not cancel incompetence, they do not heal repeated damage, they do not make inconsistency okay. When someone lacks the capacity to do right by you, their intentions become irrelevant to your wellbeing. At some point, staying becomes self betrayal. Choosing distance is not wickedness, it is self preservation. You are not asking for too much by wanting alignment between what is said and what can actually be sustained. Dearest reader, in the words of Eric Gugua, “Any intent...
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CLUE INDUCED CRAVING.

  Recently, my roommate and I decided to test one rule from Atomic Habits by James Clear, and honestly, I am still shocked, I knew this rule theoretically, because yay I've read the book. So I have this thing for glasses, an obsession even, recently it had become a part of my aesthetic. To the point that I hardly stepped out without wearing one. It felt natural, almost compulsory. But then we took a closer look. My glasses lived on my dressing drawer. Right there. Every single day. As I reached for my perfume, there they were, sitting pretty, staring at me. So I wore them. Not because I deeply loved glasses(I like them a lot though) but because they were there. Convenient, accessible, in my face. My roommate saw this and said, let us test something. She packed all my glasses into a box and kept them out of sight.  Ladies and gentlemen. I have not worn glasses in a week or so. Like guyyy. That was when it clicked. James Clear talks about cue induced craving. The idea that habit...
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I got my first 1k views for doing something utterly spontaneous. I opened a YouTube channel and started creating a specific kind of content there. Before that moment, I had not even given it serious thought. I did not sit down to calculate outcomes or imagine how far it could go. I got the idea, felt a small spark of excitement, and I ran with it. No long planning. No big expectations. Just me deciding to try. There is this thing about expectations. Having little or none saves you from a lot of unnecessary heartbreak. A lot of the times when we feel disappointed or hurt, it is not even the situation itself. It is the gap between what we expected and what actually happened. When you move without expectations, everything feels lighter. Everything feels like a gift. That is exactly why seeing one of my videos hit 1k views completely blew my mind. Not because it is some massive number by internet standards, but because I was not chasing it. I was not waiting for it. It just happened. I rea...
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HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

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Every year, I tend to write about the essence of Valentine’s, the origin, all that deep etymological shii. This time, though, I just want to acknowledge it simply. Today isn’t just about lovers. I like to say it’s about love, and love is for everyone. I remember stepping out this morning for class, and lo and behold, packages everywhere. I used to think Valentine’s was flimsy, overhyped, just an over-exaggerated display. But as I walked the streets of Ekosodin, seeing the love painted everywhere, it hit me, there’s a certain magic in it. Love is literally in the air. Maybe it’s not a massive deal, but it matters. I could only imagine how special it must feel to be on the receiving end of those gifts, the little joy it brings lighting up someone’s day. Valentine aside, I love the concept of gifting. It’s impressive, the joy you give, and the joy you get back. It’s not just the package, it’s the thought, the heart behind it. Dearest reader, Valentine’s is about love, not couples. Cultiva...
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THE RIGHT HABITS.

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“There’s nothing you can’t do, if you get the habits right.” ~ X In the words of William James, all our life, so far as it has definite form, is but a mass of habits. Pause small. Do you know that your decisions and even your indecisions are mostly built on your habits? It sounds wild, but it is true. You may think you are making well informed decisions or even terrible ones, but most times you are simply following a familiar pathway. A habit. The conversation about habits is very interesting to me because, well, I can be such a lazy person. I like easy ways. I like small tricks that help me get the job done without stressing too much. And that curiosity led me to really think about habits and how important they are in our lives. Think about it this way. Everything in this world is made up of atoms. Atoms are the basic and simplest unit of any element. That is exactly how habits work. They are the basic unit of behaviour. They quietly build our personality, our lifestyle, and eventuall...
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GIST O'CLOCK.

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Dearest reader, I attended a mask party yesterday and mehn! It was great, and the best part? I performed on stage. It was organised by my faculty, a fresher's welcome party, hence I wrote something that would appeal to the average fresher. Now, you my dear wasn't there, and I wasn't able to get a full coverage of my time up there, so here goes nothing (the written yada I performed)  Let me know how much you like it, deal? She opens the WhatsApp group chat. Yet another, “Congratulations, you’ve been admitted.” Her chest tightens, celebration everywhere, but not for her. With trembling fingers, she leaves the group, minimizes WhatsApp, and opens Chrome again. For the third time today, JAMB CAPS. Her heart feels like a hollow auditorium, and the only beat is panic. The fear spreads across her chest while she waits for her JAMB CAPS to load her status, her eyes filled with hope as she mutters under her breath, “God abeg.” The dread that this time would be just like last year, w...
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