People are exactly what they seem to be.
Actions reveal who a person is, regardless of what is said. Oftentimes, people show us exactly who they are, but we tend to make excuses for them, whereas sometimes, that is just them.
You know that thing where you feel someone is a certain way at first, and then later convince yourself that it’s just a front? That they are probably good people deep down and are only pretending to be jerks? Most times, they are actually just jerks, and we want so badly to see the good in people that we explain away everything that tells us otherwise.
Somebody is exhibiting toxic behaviour and you’re like, “He’s a good guy at heart, he’s just putting up a front.” Oga, he may not be putting up a front. In fact, most of the time, the people we are making excuses for are exactly what they seem to be. We just don’t want to believe it.
That’s why my friend Jnie always says that whenever she has an off feeling about someone and brushes it off as her overthinking or reading too much meaning into something that probably means nothing, it always turns out that her initial feeling about the person was right.
People don’t really hide who they are. We just choose not to see it, and that is how we end up breaking our own hearts. We want so badly to believe that they are pseudo evil, false evil, good wrapped in the clothing of evil, when sometimes, they are simply exactly what they seem.
They are not wrapped, they are the wrapper. Lol.
Dearest reader, when people show you who they are, believe them. You don’t have to turn every red flag into a misunderstood shade of green. You don’t have to search for a hidden goodness in someone’s behaviour just because you want there to be one. Give people grace, yes, but don’t let grace become an excuse for repeatedly ignoring what is right in front of you.
People are not always secretly better than their actions suggest. Sometimes, their actions are the most honest introduction they will ever give you.
And perhaps loving people wisely also means knowing when to stop arguing with the evidence.
@favvy_Okwansđź–¤
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