TO BE A WRITER… (5)

There’s a way a writer lives.

And I don’t mean the aesthetic. Not the coffee, not the books, not the “soft life writer” vibe people post on Instagram.

I mean the actual lifestyle. The one that happens quietly. The one that happens in the mind, in the heart, in the way you move through life.

Because writing isn’t just what I do.

It is who I am.

It is the way I process the world.

Sometimes, I’ll be in a place and everyone is present, laughing, gist-ing, living normally… but my mind is somewhere else, collecting details. I’m watching the way someone’s eyes change when they mention a name. I’m noticing how somebody smiles but their voice doesn’t match it. I’m hearing words, but I’m also hearing what is not being said.

And I don’t even do it on purpose.

It’s just the way my mind works.

To be a writer is to never fully rest. Even in moments that seem ordinary, something in you is always paying attention. Your heart is always taking notes, your brain is always recording, your spirit is always asking questions.

That is why writing is not a hobby for some of us.

It is a lifestyle.

I mean, it's the in the way you literally live you everyday life, the little intricate part of your living, like breathing in and out.

A writer lives like someone who is constantly in between worlds. One part of you is living the moment, the other part of you is already turning it into a story. You can be happy, but you’re still observing happiness. You can be heartbroken, but you’re still analyzing the heartbreak. You can be angry, but you’re still searching for the perfect words to describe the anger. 

Sometimes I feel like writers don’t just experience life, we interpret it. We break it down, we examine it, we try to understand it, then we put it back together in words.

And that is the strange thing about being a writer. Even when you’re not writing, you’re still writing. Not with your hands, but with your mind. 

It is living with your heart open, even when it hurts. It is constantly paying attention, even when you want to switch off. It is feeling deeply, and still finding a way to make meaning out of it.

So dearest reader, to be a writer is not just to bleed on paper. It is to live in a way that makes everything worthy of words,it is to live like your life is a library of moments, and your mind is the shelf that stores them.

And sometimes, it is exhausting.

But mostly it is beautiful.

@favvy_Okwans🖤.