Favvy_Okwans🖤

"The me I see is the me I'll become." ~ X I've always been heavy on self perception like mahd. I was watching a YouTube video today when the YouTuber said something that completely blew my mind. He said, and I quote, "The strongest part of the human mind is the need to maintain consistency with our identity." It was such a gbam! moment. Not because it was a new concept, but because it confirmed one of my deepest axioms. One question I always ask people is, "How do you see you?" because everything that's possible for you stems from how you see yourself. We are constantly trying to stay consistent with the kind of person we believe we are. People often tell me I'm tenacious, and over time I've found myself sticking things out simply because I've come to believe that's the kind of person I am. In the same way, as the clock inches toward dusk, I know I'll write because I'm the sort of person who writes every day. Did you cat...

You see that thing they say, "When the rain stops falling the umbrella becomes a burden", I practically experienced it firsthand today. Lol. It has been raining up and down for a while now. Just this week I've gotten home drenched up to two times, and today I knew it'd be no different if I didn't take an umbrella. Sure enough, it started drizzling and I was covered. On my way back from school though, the weather had completely cleared, so the umbrella was practically useless and, apparently, a burden. As at the morning it was such a lifesaver, but afterward it was just something added to my stress. It made me think about how quickly our perspective changes. The very thing I couldn't stop appreciating a few hours ago became the same thing I was complaining about carrying. Not because it had changed, but because my circumstances had. It's just like I say quite often, how we don't realize the extent of the promise we're making while we're making t...

It's a lie when I said it was no big deal. Trust me, I was trying to be brave when I said, "We win some, we lose some." I woke up in the middle of the night clutching my chest because I couldn't breathe properly. Later, I cried myself to sleep because the possibility of what if simply wouldn't leave me. I participated in an essay writing competition recently. If you know me, you'll know my writing means the world to me. For me, it isn't just words on a blank page. It is soul to paper. It is pouring out the entirety of my being, unraveling every part of myself and laying it bare. I had plenty of time to write the essay, but I wouldn't be Favour Okwanyionu if I didn't leave things until the last minute. About a week before the deadline, I finally became serious about my research because I was writing on a topic I had little prior knowledge of. Eventually, my essay was ready. Because it meant so much to me, I was intentional. I was meticulous. I remem...

"There's something about falling so many times that the floor starts to feel like home." ~ X The worst kind of failure isn't the one that knocks you down. It's the one that teaches you to stay down. You've failed so much that you slowly begin to comply with it, you stop expecting things to work out, you stop dreaming as loudly, you stop trying as hard because, somehow, you've convinced yourself that disappointment is simply your portion. It's like discovering there's a basement beneath rock bottom, and deciding to furnish it. At first, every setback hurts. You cry, you question everything, you promise yourself you'll never let it happen again. Then it happens again. And again. Then one day, you don't even react anymore. You just dust yourself off and think, "Here we go again." It's funny how humans can adapt to almost anything, even disappointment. Maybe that's why some people never leave the floor. Not because they enjoy ...

I'm hardly a football fan, but one thing I deeply admire about the sport is the passion it inspires. The World Cup is currently ongoing, and you don't even have to watch a match to feel the tension. It's almost electrifying. I remember coming online and seeing that Egypt was leading. Omor I knew it wasn't going to be easy for Messi fans. I was still in transit then, but by the time I got home, I was shocked to discover that Argentina hadn't just equalised, they had gone on to win. Everywhere was alive. One sport having that much impact is astonishing because, damn. On the roads, in the streets, in viewing centres, everywhere possible, people were shouting, celebrating, and basking in the joy of the victory. That's what I envy about football. That's what draws me to it, the raw passion, the unfiltered excitement, the unwavering loyalty. Someone even said they didn't need to eat anymore that night because Messi had already satisfied them. Another joked tha...

A lot of things could be avoided if we just talked. That was the realization I came to today. I had a little quarrel with one of my favorite people, and for a few days we were at odds. It was such a weird feeling because this is literally the person who vets almost all my edits. I'd finish editing something, instinctively want to send it across, then remember we weren't exactly talking, and I'd just keep my phone. I don't keep grudges, that's too much work. I don't even let the sun set on my anger. I'm usually quick to be the bigger person. So as the days passed, I realized I wasn't angry anymore. Hurt? A little. Disappointed? Maybe. But angry? Not anymore. The problem was that we'd both said things in anger, and pride made it difficult to admit that maybe we had gone too far. We both knew something needed to be fixed, but neither of us wanted to be the first to lower our guard. As we finally made efforts to sort things out, it hit me that almost eve...