Favvy_Okwans🖤

"There's something about falling so many times that the floor starts to feel like home." ~ X The worst kind of failure isn't the one that knocks you down. It's the one that teaches you to stay down. You've failed so much that you slowly begin to comply with it, you stop expecting things to work out, you stop dreaming as loudly, you stop trying as hard because, somehow, you've convinced yourself that disappointment is simply your portion. It's like discovering there's a basement beneath rock bottom, and deciding to furnish it. At first, every setback hurts. You cry, you question everything, you promise yourself you'll never let it happen again. Then it happens again. And again. Then one day, you don't even react anymore. You just dust yourself off and think, "Here we go again." It's funny how humans can adapt to almost anything, even disappointment. Maybe that's why some people never leave the floor. Not because they enjoy ...

I'm hardly a football fan, but one thing I deeply admire about the sport is the passion it inspires. The World Cup is currently ongoing, and you don't even have to watch a match to feel the tension. It's almost electrifying. I remember coming online and seeing that Egypt was leading. Omor I knew it wasn't going to be easy for Messi fans. I was still in transit then, but by the time I got home, I was shocked to discover that Argentina hadn't just equalised, they had gone on to win. Everywhere was alive. One sport having that much impact is astonishing because, damn. On the roads, in the streets, in viewing centres, everywhere possible, people were shouting, celebrating, and basking in the joy of the victory. That's what I envy about football. That's what draws me to it, the raw passion, the unfiltered excitement, the unwavering loyalty. Someone even said they didn't need to eat anymore that night because Messi had already satisfied them. Another joked tha...

A lot of things could be avoided if we just talked. That was the realization I came to today. I had a little quarrel with one of my favorite people, and for a few days we were at odds. It was such a weird feeling because this is literally the person who vets almost all my edits. I'd finish editing something, instinctively want to send it across, then remember we weren't exactly talking, and I'd just keep my phone. I don't keep grudges, that's too much work. I don't even let the sun set on my anger. I'm usually quick to be the bigger person. So as the days passed, I realized I wasn't angry anymore. Hurt? A little. Disappointed? Maybe. But angry? Not anymore. The problem was that we'd both said things in anger, and pride made it difficult to admit that maybe we had gone too far. We both knew something needed to be fixed, but neither of us wanted to be the first to lower our guard. As we finally made efforts to sort things out, it hit me that almost eve...

"What shapes you isn't what you want to become. It's the journey into who you want to become." ~ IAMP Sometimes, the process is frustrating. It's slow, uncomfortable, and can feel completely unnecessary, but that's exactly where the gold lies. I like to say that when it gets really hard, hold on a little longer. It might just be the point where things are about to change. Because in the end, it isn't really about the destination. It's about the process that gets you there. I remember when I decided I wanted to become a writer. I got a coach, excited to start learning how to write better. Instead of jumping straight into writing, he took me through a process. At the time, it honestly felt like pure wickedness. I couldn't understand why we had to spend so much time on drills that didn't seem to have anything to do with writing. Looking back now, I understand how priceless that process was. At the end of the day, it wasn't talent alone that sh...

You know that thing people say about how being scared of something somehow brings it your way? I've always brushed it off as one of those myths people repeat. That was until I experienced something yesterday  Yesterday, I attended my roommate's department fresher's event. At some point, they announced a game session, and immediately I heard the rules for one particular game, my heart started racing. I was genuinely scared, in fact, I almost stood up to leave. My roommate laughed and said, "Calm down, look around. This hall is filled with so many people, the chances of it getting to you are very slim." That sounded reasonable, so I sat back down, well, you can already guess what happened. Out of everyone in that hall, the game found its way to my side. I was so annoyed ehn, but according to my roommate, my fear was the reason it happened. She insisted I somehow "attracted" it by worrying so much. Now, I don't know if that's true. Was it simply coi...

It was my birthday today, and did the birthday blues get to me? Absolutely. I cried three different times today. If you had asked me why, I honestly wouldn't have had a reasonable answer for you. I just felt heavy. Every birthday carries two emotions. There's the thrill of becoming a year older and the panic of actually becoming a year older. This year was no different, except the panic seemed louder than the excitement. Still, I like to think I'm sober. Deeply grateful for life. Grateful that God has preserved me to see another year. I know that is a gift many never get to experience, and I don't take it for granted. The thing about birthdays is that they force you to reflect. They make you pause, look back, and compare where you are with where you thought you would be. And for someone like me, someone who sets specific goals and timelines for herself, birthdays almost always become an evaluation meeting. Did I become who I wanted to be? Did I do enough? Could I have t...